hi Jigglypuff,

welcome to the forums!

after i finished reading your post, the first thing that popped in my head was "communication." you are corresponding completely through the written word? (are SMS messages on the cell phone text or voice messages?)

why do you say that the reason she is continually cancelling your meetings cannot be because she is scared or nervous? have you asked her? would you consider it a possibility until you find out for sure, one way or the other? keeping an open mind to all kinds of possibilities could help with this situation.

where will you be meeting when you do meet? i nice public cafe? someplace where you'll both feel comfortable? will you be meeting briefly at first, just in case things don't work out for some reason?

she may be in the same boat, so to speak, of not having been in a relationship before. (although, i consider the experience of having relationships with family and friends important, too.)

now, back to communication. written communication, email, text messages on the cell phone, is kind of one sided. even though one person writes, and the other responds, and it goes back and forth, there's no instant opportunity for clarification, for body language, for voice fluctuations and intonations, for eye contact. communication can occur without any words, at least that's what i believe.

so, what can you do without this face-to-face contact? if you're real serious about creating a relationship, tell her how you feel, how it feels that she keeps cancelling. does she know how you feel? tell her that, and these are your words, that she seems a nice enough person but that you just don't know what's happening. i think that's fair enough to ask. if she wasn't interested, why would she keep asking you to meet with her? what does she gain from "jerking" you around? that's an awful long time and a lot of energy corresponding, setting up meetings and such. ask her if she is too busy to meet with you. ask her specific questions. try to get specific answers. tell her how you feel.

i think that's the only way you can tell if it was meant to be, to communicate.

if anybody else has anything, agrees with me or disagrees, please add your two cents (or whatever currency you use - two cents is only one above a penny for your thoughts, which is one cent) . i am by no means a relationship expert.

good luck with you Jigglypuff, and let us know how you're doing!

splash