>>can a chiropractor help, or any pain relievers?

i have a good rheumatologist and have been trying different things but have not found anything that will give me any relief so far. the depression and other health issues have made dealing with the arthritis a lessor priority... although i know they are very much linked i'm spending so much time and effort dealing with the depression that i haven't had a chance to make a new appt with the rheum doc yet.

As for being needy, its just that i always felt like a strong complete person and my vision of a relationship for myself has always been of two people sharing their lives and interests and the two making more than the sum of the individuals. now i am unhappy, unhealthy, and completely questioning my philosophy of life, grief and happiness. I can't envision this "me" in a relationship of any sort that would fit my view of what a relationship should be, at least for me. at the very least if ihadn't given up hope i would certainly be putting the "relationship searching" on hold until i fixed myself up first. in the depressed state i'm in i wouldn't be able to do any "searching" in any case.

Although i realize that i have passed a lot of time without actively looking for a relationship throughout my life, it is also true that never ever has anyone ever approached me or tried to "pursue me" toward a relationship. and i was certainly always open to the opportunity. that fact never bothered me very much only because one of my MAIN philosophies of life is that it is absolutely not ok to sit around whining that things aren't coming true for you ("knocking on your door") because it is up to you to go out and find/make your own happiness, not sit around waiting for it to find you and whining when it doesn;t.

but in the diminished position i am in now certainly nothing is going to happen unless there was a little bit of "it coming to me" action, and since that has never happened in previous 41 years of life, i have no reason to think it is going to start happening now. In spite of what everyone always says (and that I have always believed) about me being a caring personable sensitive person who others would be happy to become part of a "twosome" obvioulsy there is something about me that overrides that and prevents it. and if anything i am in a much worse state on the "attractiveness quotient", speaking in terms of personality not looks, now that i have all these problems as a load that is constantly with me.

-- The world is what we make of it --
-- Dave
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