This- perfectly. Thank you snowqueen for describing it.

I have always wanted physical contact from people in 'helping' roles. It became too important to me and I needed more and more. My current T does not touch me- ever. In my last session, when my jealousy of her little daughter felt overwhelming, I sat at her feet and sobbed my heart out that T is not my mama, never will be, won't even let us pretend for five minutes that she is. T was right there beside me, and let me cry without reaching out to comfort me. I realised afterwards that I hadn't even wished that she would. Nothing was missing. Without any touch my tears and my grief and my self felt 'held' by T.