Hello and welcome to the forums.
I have taken Ativan before. It helped with my anxiety. Then 10 years ago I was prescribed Valium (which is in the Ativan "family" ) for anxiety/panic disorder. I wasn't told to take it as needed and took it as prescribed for years. Then a new doctor wanted to reduce me from 40mg a day to 20mg day. The withdrawls from the tapering down were terrible, I experienced terrible withdrawl anxiety and panic. Now I am on 20 mg a day routinely. I can't go without it and I am now physically dependant still after 10 years.
I think you are doing well by taking it only when you need it. I just didn't know that taking these anti anxiety drug class were extremely addictive when taked daily over a long period of time.
I will have to try the herbal tea's they sound relaxing.
Take care

KRIS
Spread the joy of a positive 2004 remember random acts of kindness
If you think you have totally gave up, you haven't, because you are here!