Lava, I am glad that you took the time to explain it better. I think that was important for everyone to see.

When I first talked with you, that was exactly what I was saying to you.
I was trying to help you understand who that man is and what you are not seeing, remember? Remember I told you that no matter what you did that he was not going to change and you had to understand that and why? Go back and look at what I told in when you came here so angry.

It was important that you brought a closer look at this because this is exactly what so many that come here have to understand and yet cannot seem to understand. And sadly they blame themselves and even hurt themselves in so many ways.

I also see this in children of alcoholic's that really struggle and can't seem to understand it. We do have to understand at some point when to let go. Sometimes many of us suffer so much before we finally understand it.
Or, even women who are married to an abusive man or an alcoholic or visa versa. In so many ways we are always trying to make up for something and seem to have keep going back to check and make sure. Or we stay with the abuser or alcoholic hoping that it will change to what we really want somehow.

You know we are still fairly new at all this family stuff, this ideal that we seem to need to exist. In the past we were lucky to even have one parent of even live as long as we do now. Abuse is nothing new either, been around probably since the very beginning.

When I think of Walt Disney and his life time and what he knew. He was trying to teach us that in all those famous cartoons. I used to ask, why does the mommy always have to die in the movie? Or sometimes charectors are orphaned somehow and they find their way and live a good life inspite of all the challenges that they face. Yes there was always a moment given to a morning in his stories, a sense of loss and acceptance.
And he always put different abusers in there too, did you notice? Some animal or entity that wanted to harm the orphan or innocent one somehow. There are many stories and books on that that are classics. And yet even though we are told this growing up when we watch these movies, we never realize that it does apply to us and life.

Yes, I am really glad you addressed that again as I really didn't want you to just end in pain or walk away feeling that it was what the answer is.
I can see that yes you have a couple of steps left and hopefully you will walk away understanding what I have also talked about. Hopefully that final dressing that is taken off that brain injury called PTSD will result in the strength of knowing that we can be strong and be that good person that was treated badly and yes, we were that good person all along.

I have to laugh, look our moods, your anxious and Im frustrated. How funny is that LOL

Open Eyes