I'm sorry to hear how much you hurt. I agree that it seems like it will never get better. I only know that it has gotten better before. That is also depressing because it scares me to think that it may get better only to get worse again.

Right now I am trying to think of something that will help me feel better if even for a short while. Moment by moment, right? I hope you will find the comfort you deserve and the strength you need to do what will help you. This is a tough battle. I wish you well!!