((((((((((zoo)))))))))))))

Please don't be so hard on yourself!

My T really, REALLY believes that we all have a drive to heal...and that whatever we're doing is an attempt to get to that place of wholeness.

If we haven't learned healthy ways of coping, learning, etc., all we have are the things we've figured out for ourselves...whether it's dissociating, or running away, or ED stuff, or cutting, or whatever. It doesn't mean that we're "bad" or "too sick" to be helped or anything like that. It means that we need help learning a new way to be.

I know you know I ask my T for reassurance a lot. I remember at one point, I asked him something, and he answered. And then later in the same session I asked him again, and he said "did you hear what I said earlier?". And I told him that after years and years and years and years of being told I'm bad, I'm unlovable, whatever that it makes sense that I might need to hear the opposite over and over again. And he got it, thankfully. It makes sense to me that you need reassurance, and I'm sorry that T is being so frustrated about it.

I don't have BPD, but I do have Complex PTSD, which seems like almost the same thing. I've done a ton of healing, without DBT. It's not the only way...it is one way. There are others.

Please be gentle with you. It sounds like you want to turn a lot of this on yourself and being "borderline"...things are just more complex than that.

Lots of to you, my friend