Hi. I have been in therapy for 17 of my 33 years with a variety of different kinds of therapists. My first was just a very warm nurturing T who wanted to help very badly but I was too scared... So she did nothing. We are now friends, she loves me like a daughter but would still never have anything to offer me as a therapist. The next got overwhelmed by my history on session 2, canceled our next appointment and wouldn't answer/call back to set another one. T 3 was a "smile be happy" type that wanted me to focus just on the here and now without coming to terms with my past and struggles. T 4 was a cognitive behaviorist who was VERY direct in her approach and gave me skills to combat my flashbacks and body memories. T 4 helped me a great deal. T 5 was a "trust the process" T who cared deeply about me and truly believed she was doing the best possible thing she could to help me heal. T 5 hurt me more than any of my abusers. T 6 was also a "trust the process" type and cared deeply about me. I spiraled down and out of control at a mind boggling pace. I went to her feeling suicidal one day and she told me I could never come back to see her again. She wasn't going to have me die on her like her dad did. Again far more harm than good. Current T is very direct with me and somewhat more of a "life coach" than a therapist. I tell her what is going on and she helps me to find more options about what to do than I can come up with on my own. She is especially helpful to me with my social anxieties and insecurity. She is primarily trained as a family systems therapist although she knows lots of other stuff too. I also currently work with a massage T too who has training as a T, training in body work and in Eastern and "new age" healing modalities. She is just awesome.

All that said, while some here at PC have done really great work with "trust the process" Ts I am not one of them. There are a ton of different Ts out there, different personalities and different training. Finding the right "fit" is hard. IMO the only person who can fail at therapy is the therapist. I believe you can be helped, I believe that there is healing out there far better that what the "experts" say is possible, I believe that we are worth all the hard work to find that special T or Ts that can bring us where we want to go and beyond.

Keep chasing your wholeness even if you have to change paths. You are worth it!