Our kitty is lost, followed our other cat downstairs and I guess didn't understand how to get back like he can. There is a lot of frustration going on, this morning I had to chase after my brother who ran out in the morning when I was sleeping and my Dad was at work. He just walks right out the door and he's only 9. He's been doing this since he was about 5 years old and has been brought back by the cops tons of times. I hate it, and it happens every summer almost everyday. It's so worrying and frustrating that he can't just stay home or ask if he can go and I am always the only one who has to deal with it. My Dad never deals with it.

I wish I could just throw stuff out but it would be noticeable, believe me. He'd notice if the extra unnecessary bookshelf sitting in the middle of my room disappeared. I don't like living this way, but I have since I was 8 thanks to my mother who kept moving in and out. She'd move in with all her stuff and then leave with nothing. Then my Dad started finding "fantastic" desks and brought them and now we just live in a junkyard. I really would like to have space and a nice place to live where if one of my friends waited at the door I wouldn't be embarrassed if they caught a glimpse of the living room. One of my friends had to come in and she was shocked about it then has constantly reminded me how bad SHE feels for me.. It's not a dirty house, but a messy one and some days I just feel so trapped and embarrassed about it.