(((justempty)) - I'm so sorry for the deep loss of your husband. You're lucky to have felt so loved and cared for, but this makes the loss all that more significant doesn't it? How long were you married? Since this just happened in February the loss is still so intense so please be patient with yourself.

Do you have a therapist or a counselor to help you through the grieving process? When I was a 2 yr old child my mom lost my dad when he was only 34 to stomach cancer. She was a devastated young widow of 5 children and she had a very hard time. All I can say is, try to think your husband wouldn't want you to grieve for too long or to stop living. Maybe you can pick up a new hobby or volunteer for hospice. Sending you warm hugs and hope for a better days ahead.