((((((((pixiegirls)))))))))

I am so sorry to hear what you are dealing with. Unfortunately I know all to well the pain of how having a parent or even husband with it can effect the whole family.

What your daughter is learning to be is a co-dependant and that is not good for her at all. Ofcourse he will not stop, he still has someone around to pick up the pieces and what is she doing now, playing shoffer?

You all need to get help, go to an ACOA meeting or even an Al-anon meeting NOW. What you are describing is a very bad mindset for not only you but your children and it really is not fair to them. They will carry this for the rest of their lives and even blame themselves in some way. Get them help, please, they should not have to suffer.

Alcoholics will lie, cheat, manipulate anyone they can to continue to drink.
Because your husband did not get help to learn how to live a sober life one step at a time, well, no matter how many times he stops, he WILL GO BACK. Unfortunately many of them do not seek help until they lose everything and everyone. Then they finally admit they are powerless over the disease. And sadly many of them die because they cannot stop or do not get it. I am surprised that your ex is not having to go thru a program for the DUI. That would be the only thing that your daughter could participate in, an AA meeting to understand what her father needs to do.
But she and all of you need to go to a meeting that supports YOU. ACOA and Al-anon are very good for that because you are welcome, the other people there are just like you, so there is nothing to be embarrassed about. You may even find friends there that will be more supportive and understanding to you and your children.

Try going and keep in touch and let us know how you make out.

Open Eyes