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I'm not sure whether this is appropriate or not, but maybe part of the trick is to not interact with people, other than acquaintances, in only one format. Not that I am saying that you should do everything with every friend (close or otherwise) but to do more than just than just one thing, like coffee with the man you talked about. If you invited him to go bowling or play mini-golf (maybe those are cheesy examples, but they're fun) then you'd be interacting with him in a different way, because the activity would necessitate it. Maybe this will help or maybe it wont, but I wish you luck in finding mutually beneficial relationships.
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It is said an Eastern monarch once charged his wise men to invent him a sentence, to be ever in view, and which should be true and appropriate in all times and situations. They presented him the words: "And this, too, shall pass away." How much it expresses! How chastening in the hour of pride! How consoling in the depths of affliction!
---"Address before the Wisconsin State Agricultural Society". Abraham Lincoln Online. Milwaukee, Wisconsin. September 30, 1859.
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