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_Sky said:
HOW does one "accept" their disability?
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_Sky . . . It's a process. There's no quick solution. It's an attitude change or perception change on your identity.
For me, I initially looked at my disability as a stumbling block at "happiness." When I "decided" I wanted to be happy (that happiness was something I valued, desired, and needed), THEN I was able to risk failure and work on little things in my life to obtain happiness.
I think "acceptance" of anything is achieved with only a positive mindset. If you are pessimistic about everything, then acceptance probably won't come, or without a major struggle.
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_Sky said:
One of the underlying problems I seem to have is that I haven't "accepted" my disability. I think I understand that by not accepting it (somehow) I continue to have expectations/hopes of doing and becoming... which what? I won't ever again do or become???
I know, in my mind, that I can't do things, that I live with constant pain also. I have limited my expectations (I think) and my calendar down to almost nothing... and think I understand it is just the way things are...
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_Sky . . . that is very insightful. Maybe consider working on that perception change within yourself? Maybe there ARE things you can do but at this moment are unable to visualize yourself doing? For instance, maybe you need accommodations to help you achieve your wants and goals? There's nothing wrong with accommodations. Also, sometimes we just need a little more time to do stuff . . . which means, you can still do stuff, but just a little slower . . . that's still able-bodied!
View yourself as a "normal" person . . . you can do normal things . . . or you will be able to do normal things in time.
Sometimes I think our problems are because we think we are the alone, that nobody else goes through what we do. There are many people who are disabled and work through their issues. I watch a lot of Discovery Health Channel shows and have seen people who are severely dismembered and who function normally within their life. Expand your mind. Have hope. Research accommodations. There are possibilities out there for you you probably haven't considered. You can do it!
