Hey Suzzie,
I am sorry to here you are struggling at the moment, it looks like you are going through a lot
Do you cuts need any medical attention? Are they safe and away from any harm? If you are wanting to S/I maybe you should find alternatives, could you hide all the equipment you have away from you? Is it during your session or after it?
Why not take a look at this article
It's called dealing with urges
http://www.thesite.org/healthandwell...alingwithurges
Here are also a few coping tips and distractions on this page of the site
http://www.thesite.org/healthandwell...nddistractions
Quote:
The A-Z of distractions
Often the best thing is to find out what has worked for other people who understand where you're coming from. TheSite.org asked young people from young people's mental health service, 42nd Street in Manchester, to come up with some of the alternatives that help them.
Alternative therapies: massage, reiki, meditation, acupuncture, aromatherapy.
Bake or cook something tasty.
Clean (and won't your folks/housemates be pleased!).
Craftwork: make things, draw or paint.
Dance your socks off.
Eat sweets or chocolate for an instant sugar rush (but be careful of the dip in your mood once it's over).
Exercise for a release of endorphins and that feel-good factor.
Forward planning - concentrate on something in the future, like a holiday.
Go for a walk (preferably further than the local pub).
Go online and look at websites that offer you advice and information.
Hang out with friends and family.
Have a bubble bath with lots of bath bombs fizzing around you.
Have a good cry.
Hug a soft toy.
Invite a friend round.
Join a gym or a club.
Knit (it's not just for old people you know).
Listen to music.
Moisturise.
Music: singing, playing instruments, listening to (basically making as much noise as you can).
Open up to a friend or family member about how you are feeling.
Pop bubble wrap.
Phone a helpline or a friend.
Play computer games.
Play with a stress ball or make one yourself.
Read a book.
Rip up a phone directory (does anyone actually use them these days?).
Scream into an empty room.
Shop 'til you drop.
Smoke - smokers find that having a fag can help.
Spend time with babies (when they're in a good mood).
Tell or listen to jokes.
Use the internet.
Visit a zoo or a farm (animals do the best things).
Volunteer for an organisation (will make you feel all warm inside).
Watch TV or films - particularly comedies.
Write: diary, poems, a book.
Write negative feelings on paper, then rip them up.
Yoga: meditation, deep breathing - this might help you relax and control your urges.
Zzz - get a good night's sleep.
Updated: 13/09/2010
Written by Julia Pearlman
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Take care
(((((((((Suzzie))))))))