Hello.

Today, my friend reminded me that I am not over my aunt's death.

Yes, things are a little better; it's been 2 years now.

But I am still ill a lot and still feel empty and lost.

I also feel an anticipatory loss---my roommate may be dying now and I don't know what's going to happen to myself and my husband; we cannot afford a place together. I can sense Bruce fading away before my eyes. He is so tired and so out of it. He told me he was "depressed", but he's been depressed before and not this messed up.

I still feel pretty crazy missing a woman who abused me because she resented my being born. But I do.

I wish I had the right words, too, to say how much I relate to others' grief here, too, even though your stories are not exactly like mine.

Billi