belle....

Thank you for replying. I have had a lot of time to think about what happened and, more importantly, what I want out of a relationship. You mentioned a partnership.... you are lucky to have such a relationship. I guess I wanted someone to not only be my partner, but to share a very affectionate and passionate relationship as well. I now have come to the conclusion that the "complete" relationship that I am seeking may never materialize.

I just don't know what I can do to stop caring for her, stop missing her.... stop loving her. As to another relationship, I really don't see that happening for the foreseeable future. I feel caught between a "rock and a hard place". I know that in order to be in a place where I can take on another relationship I must be the best person I can be. But, my ongoing depression, fueled in large part by missing the love of my life, prevents me from getting there. And, there is no other woman I want to be with so I am trying my best to take teh steps I need to take to live a life alone. Because, I would rahter be alone than to be with another woman and always be thinking of her, wishing that I was with her. It is just easier and less painful to be alone.