Hi ydarb and welcome to psychcentral. I would suggest browsing all the different forums and seeing if you can pinpoint any similarities with yourself and the people here and see what kind of suggestions you might get. Something you said stuck out with me, you said, "Since I've been here I developed a general apathy for everything but drinking and essentially being a bum." I've felt that way for sure....so PM me if like, and hope to see you posting more!

~Rayna