I have not been able to respond to a lot of post today because of being so busy. I hope to get to more later. Right now, I'm asking for help and I hope you all don't think it's selfish. No you aren't selfish at all, you have been quite supportive and it's ok to ask for help when you need it!

I had a chance to talk with T on the phone yesterday which helped with some of my overwhelming feelings over the past few days. We talked for the usual 10 minutes and then quickly said goodbye. I don't feel like she cut me off, but the quick goodbye she gave made me feel " shoved away" slightly. She was nice on the phone though and was not cold but not as warm as usual. Perhaps I'm just letting my feelings get the best of me. She always allows calls though, so I didn't go against any boundary. It could just be your perception and not really the reality as it was for her......maybe she had something to do in a hurry but didn't mean to make you feel as if she was pushing YOU away. You got 10 minutes, that is pretty good .......when T calls me back, I get about 3-5 minutes!

Un-related to that, normally I want to go to my appointments, but this week, I don't. I know the general consensus is that you should go when you feel you can't, but I'm just really exhausted over the past couple weeks with a lot of stuff going on. I just feel like I need a break from being in my head. I never had it come up where I contemplated not going. I know I need to go. I'm wondering if I should text my T and let her know that I'm struggling with coming tomorrow but that I'll be there. Perhaps declaring it to her will push me to make sure I get there. Thoughts? She normally does not mind text or phone calls but I never texted her something like that. Normally only text about appointments and stuff. She never said what's okay to text and what's not. She is always caring and gental.
you could text her, I see nothing amiss in doing that......
Thanks for reading this...