inkblot
I not to certain as to what you mean by you don't want to start freaking again, but if it makes you feel any better you do have an advantage. That is that you know that there is a chance that you might start freaking. You know what tendenicies you have displayed in the past and you are consicous about not wanting it. sometimes just knowing this helps. So relax, your freaking out a few years ago wasn't totally for nothing; it gave you a means of knowlege for the future.