Hi Splash, thanks for the reply.

Yes it is text messages. But one problem I have is that I don't know how or am too afraid to show or even tell anybody my feelings. Particularly face to face. As I was extremely hurt a long time ago when I did show feelings, so I shut them out and ignored them. It is not that I don't have feelings but I can't show them. I'm afraid of being hurt again. Well I haven't asked her if she is scared but I think I am probably more scared to meet. Since I am scared I wouldn't ask to meet. What is bothering me is she does ask me then continually cancels. If she is scared then why does she not wait until she is more comfortable to go ahead with it. I don't mind waiting. Just that when someone says something then goes against that especially on a continual basis then that is unnerving. It brings a lot of doubts. I'm not too good with words. I go more with actions rather than words. To me words are hollow. Anybody could quote Shakespeare but they don't actually mean anything. They're just reading of a script. What a person does is of more importance. I'm sorry but I don't really trust what anybody says. I've been let down too often by too many people. I'll wait and see what develops. Though it won't surprise me if it happens again. I'll take your advice into consideration. Were supposed to meet for a coffee. This is bothering me now. I would rather just get it done and over with either way. I would be happy if we could just even meet and then I would know where I stand.

On a similar note. Two years ago when I was at my worst. I asked someone that I trusted and had known for a long time if they could help me with my difficulties. They said yes. I got some help at first then later they told me they couldn't help. I asked why and they said they didn't know how to help me. I told them how - by just listening to me. That was all I wanted. Then they told me they didn't have time for me. All the while saying that they did "want" to help me but "couldn't". I'm angry at that. I'm also angry and confused at something a psychologist asked me about something that happened to me. I can't believe she even asked me. I won't go into that here thats a separate issue. Maybe I'll post it elsewhere.