Why do I do this to myself....

I have binged for weeks now and have not been to the gym since 29th April. I don't have the energy to go to the gym. I didn't think I was too bad until just now.....

I went to put on a pair if jeans which I only wore last week and I not can't fit into them. They are a "medium" size in UK and I am really angry at myself for doing this. Why can't I just do the good decent thing and just not eat.

The whole point of the gym was to lose weight as my Depakote had made me add a few pounds/stones whatever it is. I am just raging now

I wish I didn't binge but I do and I always like to binge. A huge bag of crisps are staring me in the face

GRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!