I went to a therapist a couple years back, and it didn't work out, but she did say one thing to me that really stuck with me, which was that I resort to anger in most situations, because anger tends to be empowering in general. Feeling sad, anxious, even feeling love, tends to make me feel vulnerable or in in my mind, "weak". Kind of like I'm not in control? Have you ever examined your thoughts after the fact and tried to see if you were mad at him "because at the time I was feeling _?" Maybe that would help you some?

To be more succinct, sometimes my anger has nothing to do with my actually being angry.