Ahhh.....the age old question, Why do we try so hard for others to like us?

I think for many different reasons. I guess acceptance is a biggie. If someone doesnt like us we will automatically blame ourself and think that there is something wrong with us. So we try harder, most times going out of the realm of what we would normaly do to make friends because we want so badly to be accepted.

Does that make sense?

Also, I think we define ourself by how well we are liked. We shouldnt but I feel alot of us do it. If we are not well liked, well, again, we will take the blame on that too and assume that it is our fault for one reason or another.

I tend to beleive that alot of these traits can be traced back to our child hood. Feeling abandoned and alone can make us, as adults, go out of our way to feel accepted.

I think that therapy and a whole lot of soul searching as to why we choose to go out of our way and to go to such extremes for acceptance is the key to changing our behavior. We have to get to the point where we are confident and secure with ourself that acceptance from others will eventually become less important. The old saying "We must love ourself before we can love someone else" to me rings true. I think that we have to get to know ourself, like ourself, love ourself and that the positivity we put out will be noticed by those around us.....thus, making it easier to find quality friends that we will not have to go to extremes to impress.