Squiggle

I had resoved to keep out of this thread, since this is such a huge and painful issue with me - but your last post was so familiar to me that I just thought I would put in a word.

There is no forgiveness for me in myself; for all others I can make allowances and give the benefit of the doubt, but I am IN HERE and I know this person, I can't gloss over anything.

T says that I have to get to know the SAWE of the years that i did those things that I hate myself for, and as I become more familiar with that time and that SAWE, I can develop some compassion for her. apparently this can be the beginning of forgiveness. Empty chair, hypnosis, meditation, art, whatever will get you back in time, apparently.

about the marriage situation boy do I know this one - but I realize that marriage is a coupling of two people, and when one of the two changes, the relationship changes - has to. So as you continue to heal and grow, there will be effects in the marriage too.
Many gentle hugs for you, my compassionate and kind friend