Palemoss makes a really great point... yes, the aftermath of a mania can often include PTSD type symptoms. For example, if you went through a phase when you picked fights with everyone and kept getting arrested, you can really feel not just shame but suffer flashbacks when, for example, you see a police car whizz past flashing blue lights. And then another problem can arise when, in your efforts not to go "bonkers" again you overly ritualise your behaviour, developing OCD type mannerisms to prevent you from going off at the deep end.

There's a lot to work through, but the best place to start is by forgiving yourself. Most of what traumatises you is a result of the illness. You wouldn't blame a diabetic for having a hypoglycaemic fit... and much of what is done in those states can be very similar to a bipolar high or mixed state. If you can forgive a diabetic, you can surely forgive yourself when your illness causes you to behave in similarly chaotic ways.