With most mental health issues, getting professional help is often the only way to change bad habits. You seem to not want to do that, though, and instead are relying on amateurs. So, I don't know what it is you're really asking for.
I will be the first to admit that I don't understand you, but I'm willing to be supportive as long as you are serious about changing your bad habits.
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thatsallicantypewithonehand
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