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The biggest problem though is that I am just assuming this and have not asked him. I'm terrified to ask him because I'm scared of what he will say. My fear of his answer is stronger than my anxiety and depression that I am having from this whole situation. We are becoming really good friends and I don't want to lose him.
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*hugs* It's impossible to tell what he's feeling without asking him. I know this is NOT the answer you were looking for but in my opinion communication is the most important in a relationship, and I think in this case it's lacking in this area. I know it's scary to talk about.
It sounds like the worst that can happen is he says he doesn't want a relationship. At that point you could probably be friends just like you are now but you can't be idealistic and lie to yourself that it can become something more. The GOOD thing about that, is that you won't get hurt even worse later.
The best thing that can happen is him saying "Oh, I thought that was obvious, of course we're in a relationship!!!" xD
And there's lots of grey inbetween - you could work to get over his fears of being in a relationship (if he has them), you can work on defining what your relationship is.
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The only way I can verify is by asking and I'm too scared! I know it is ridiculous, but I'm scared of scaring him away.
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For what it's worth I don't think you'll scare him away. And honestly if it does it sounds like it's not the right relationship for you anyways - it sounds like you need some forms of commitment (... like LOADS of people including me

), and as I said I don't think you'll scare him away as a friend. You might scare YOURSELF away, but probably not him as easily. Could be totally wrong but from what I read that's my guess
anyways, wishing you luck in getting up the courage if that's what you decide to do. Thanks for sharing the story and take care!!!