I hear you. Maybe it is more about where they are than what you have done wrong. Maybe they pick the posts they can reply to. Maybe they pick particular forums. I don't know.

As to being hurt, I think that happens to a lot of us online. I also think we all have to find our own ways of dealing with that. For me that sometimes means stepping back from the whole forum thing. Sometimes it means stepping aside from situations which remind me of other situations in which I have been hurt, and sometimes it means keeping a distance from people who remind me of others who have hurt me. I realise that is not always "fair" to the people involved, but it's the best I can do.

I also increasingly live by the saying, "Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me." That was said to me by someone who later hurt me badly and when they said it I wasn't ready to hear it. Now I see it as one of the few things I can do to protect myself. Again, it might not be fair, but it is what I need to do to protect myself. To me it's about having healthy boundaries, but I know what is healthy for me may not be healthy for others. It isn't about not forgiving someone, just about not being able to take certain risks a second time around.

Like you, I work at not taking things personally. Sometimes that is nearly impossible to achieve, however.