I have a similar situation with my father. First thing i realized is that i dont have to forgive him for the things hes done. On the other hand it was hurting me to hold on to the resentment. I have eventually forgivin him although we still do not speak to this day. I had to accept the person he is understand where he came from, further understand some of his personality disorders, and his drinking problem. What i tell my self is that i would not be here if it were not for him and I respect him as my father. For me it's all about accepting people for what they are and when we forgive and let go of the past (wich can take even a lot longer than 2 years!) we can move forward.