Okay, I am ABNORMALLY afraid of and disgusted with bugs. In front of some who view me as "the brave one" I am able to overcome my fear and squash a bug for them with a "how you like me NOW?" kind of attitude...

But at home, I am utterly TERRIFIED of bugs and anything that comes in contact with them. As I type, I have not touched my printer simply because when I opened a door I squashed a german roach in the door unknowingly, and I don't want to touch it, don't want to look at it, can't bear the thought of even cleaning it off with a cloth or with gloves on. The thought of any contact with it makes me gag.

Furthermore, I cannot touch anything that has contacted a bug unless it has been properly cleaned & sterilized, and I'm constantly cleaning things and making extra effort not to come in contact with or risk having bugs of any kind. I don't know why it's so bad now, when I used to not fear them at all...maybe it's because the seasonal change has made their appearances more frequent?

How am I supposed to live with this abnormal distaste in the back of my mind with everything I do or plan? It's driving my boyfriend nuts that he has to kill them, or clean them up, while I stand on a chair screeching like a child - which is NOT something I normally do. (ex-Army)