Quote:
Originally Posted by MrsEric
I've been in therapy for over 3 years, sometimes I think I'm doing ok, I have dealt with some of the abuse, I'm in a different place. But then, I hit really down days and I cry for my lost childhood and for all the pain and suffering.
I'm expecting my first child in September and I cry sometimes, thinking about how to be a mom to him. I was never modeled healthy parenting, how do I know I have what it takes? Ugh.
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(((MrsEric))) I too was abused as a child and had many of the same worries as you mentioned. I remember when my first child was born I was like a deer in the headlights. I went to a moms group at the hospital and watched other moms play and talk to their babies (I didn't know how to do that so I learned by watching others - fake it till you make it principle).
As my son got more into the toddler phase I plunged myself into books about positive discipline. I wasn't going to hit my child and I wanted my child to feel loved but beyond that I didn't know what to do. About that time I did start seeing a therapist as I had so many doubts and worries about being a good mom. I'm mom to two boys and while I'm not a perfect mom (no one is) I do my best to make sure my boys know they are loved and I give them lots of hugs and I Love Yous. The fact you are here and aware speaks volumes. Your son is a lucky mom. You are aware of your past so you know what not to do.
