No character flaw--your illness is likely largely genetics. People still have a stigma about mental illness as it's not well understood. Our medical scientists are still trying to figure out exactly what triggers it and how to treat it most effectively. They have come a long way but have a long way to go. You wouldn't think you were a "loser" if you had cancer or diabetes or seizures, would you? Mental illness isn't really that much different.

When someone is gossiping or name calling, I always think that is a reflection on the one doing the gossiping or the name calling. It may or may not be true. But it does say a lot about the person who would repeat something or make up something or call a person an unkind name. Shake that off--you can't change it, it is a reflection on them, not you. Deal with the things you can change--your own feelings about yourself. You might try some of the cognitive behavior exercises. They can really help you get a more realistic look at your world and those around you. Some are found in Burns, "Feeling Good Handbook". It's good for anyone, mentally ill or not. Teaches you to be aware of the cognitive distortions or faulty reasoning that can cloud your world with sadness.

One easy exercise I learned elsewhere is to take a negative thought, like, "I must be a loser". Write it down. Then write down 10 reasons why this might not be true. Keep going till you get to 10. For example: 1. I found a website where others with illnesses like mine can write to me and help me out. 2. My mother likes me. 3. My dog absolutely adores me. 4. I am good at _____ (fill in something you pride yourself in doing, even if it's just, "I cook a mean hamburger on the grill!") 5. I graduated from high school in the top half of my class. 6. I enjoy water skiing and do pretty well at it. Etc. You get the idea.