You sound a lot like me. I play the phony all the freakin time! Always put a smile on your face and act like nothing's wrong and everything's perfect, right? Yup, I thought so! It's not easy to go from one extreme to another, though.

I noticed that you were focusing mainly on material things. Although material items are important to a degree, be thankful that you still have your husband, children that are healthy, and a roof over your head! I don't have much that has't been given to me, either.

I was just trying to think of the items in my home that I have actually bought that I can call all mine, but the only thing I can think of really is my matress and boxsprings. I don't even have a bed frame. Just a matress and boxspring sitting on the floor. Our tv, tv stand, couch, chair, kitchen table and chairs, computer, computer desk, dressers, coffee table, end table, night stands were all given to us! That's actually all the furniture I own. I live in a 1-bedroom apartment, so there's not really much that I can collect.

I need a new mattress and boxsprings, too. They're all worn in...permanently imprinted from where me and my bf sleep on it! And I didn't even buy them brand new, I got them from a used furniture store!

So you are definitely not alone in all of this.

Hang in there.