Quote:
Originally Posted by rjdaws
I just got off the phone with my aunt (she and I have always been close, growing up I trusted her as much as my own mother). Since my mom passed away A year and a bit ago, my aunt always asks how I'm doing in a way that sounds like she suspects me to be suffering. She and my dad seem to discuss me a lot (I'm sure they discuss my brother as well).
Today I told her about my concerns about my mental health. I told her about the accident that happened when I was an infant (being dropped down a 6-step flight of stairs) and that I feel it's affected my life. I told her I have concerns about possibly having a mild form of autism.
She knows about my history of depression and SI but that's the most she knows and there are a lot of other issues I can't seem to explain to her. She told me not to even think about it ("it" being my mental health concerns), and that nothing is wrong with me.
I know she looks out for the best for me, I know she cares and she doesn't want me to think anything is wrong with me. But my concerns are for my health, not me thinking something is wrong with me. I'm horrible at explaining myself orally. There seems to be a lack of connection between thought formation and the words that come out of my mouth. So getting it across to her that I may have some kind of mental health issue or brain injury isn't easy (while at the same time obvious if she wasn't in denial.)
It just worries me. I do have a good support system in my family, they do care about my general health, in that they're convinced nothing is wrong with me and that I'm just weird and eccentric. But when I try to actually discuss my concerns and tell them I want to seek professional help, they completely deny the need for it. My family keeps moving farther away from me, while insisting they care. It's like they keep shoving me in little clear box, so they can observe me but not get too close, not have to touch me, not have to worry about me coming near them.
|
Hi rjdaws,
Sometimes I am so surprised at those in the health profession who don't put the pieces of the puzzle together. It may be that they are so used to treating the "body" and not the "mind." But depression, or autism or any mental issue is just as much a medical issue to be looked at and taken seriously so that you can get the help you need to feel like yourself and that you are living life to the fullest.
It sounds like in addition to paying attention to how you are feeling you also have given this a lot of very careful thought. Trust yourself. You are your first advocate. Hopefully you can find a good doctor who understands mental disorders etc (shouldn't they all?). There are family members, friends, and even some doctors and nurses who are not going to have this illness on their radar. They are simply not well enough informed. (I once had an OB/GYN who, when I told her I was diagnosed with depression told me to meditate and go to the drugstore and buy some 5-HTP. And while I am open minded about some alternative remedies, I also know that this remedy has never had any evidential clinical testing - here was a doctor offering pat advice in a serious area that wasn't even in her field!). Trust yourself and seek out the help you need because there are also good doctors who understand the illness of depression who can help, there are examples right here in the founders and administrators of this website. Sending many supportive thoughts your way.