Well, we cant really bury anything. And we cant just shove something in the past either. We have to make sure that we understand it first. We have to not just see the event but really understand what it meant why it happened and the meaning of it. And we also have to understand how it made us feel and justify our feelings understand why we reacted to it the way we did and make sure that it is settled in our mind. It is only then that we can file it as a memory that has been addressed and understood. Otherwise it will come up again.

It is also important to understand that if we are tramatized again, it can bring up the other event or events. So, the healthiest thing we can do is not just shove it or bury it. We really have to understand it first. If we cannot really look at it and see why and how it effected us and that it may even control us in some way, by hidden anger, fear, guilt, shame, confusion, and even lack of self esteem. Then burying it is not good or healthy, saying that it is just in the past is no different.

People are often effected in ways by an event that they truely don't realize. And guess what, I am one person who has realized that and it took me a long time to realize that. Truely understanding how an event effected you is very important.
And it is very important that you have a GOOD THERAPIST, when you decide to really address it. And if they don't help you, then FIND ANOTHER ONE. Dont just assume that if a therpist is running you around or just sits there and listens that is enough, you need to understand what it really means. Unless you get to that point, you havent gotten the right help, don't give up, keep trying.

Open Eyes