Ask him what he would do to himself if you got arrested and went to prison. He is telling you to lay down your life for him, do as he says or he doesn`t want you anymore so leave. But...if you leave he`s going to kill himself. You have lost all your friends and others, your self esteem and confidence and are sitting there miserable for someone treating you like a robot. I know, you are going to defend him, simply because you love him. For him to do you like this, he doesn`t love you. He knows you aren`t going to leave, he throws the "kill myself" in there to keep you there for his happiness, not yours. Turn it back on him. Tell him if he doesn`t quit dealing drugs that you are leaving. If he decides to kill himself it will be his choice because if he stays you will end up killing yourself. See how you feel now? Be bold and mean it. He doesn`t see you as bold and never will until you prove you are.