I can usually give good advice, but when it comes to myself, it just seems like my mind goes blank. I thought i would be able to over come this depression on my own, but the fact i have picked up drinking and causing myself physical pain to mask the emotional pain, i fear i am in a dangerous spiral downward. As i am writing this, i am drinking the last glass of a bottle of wine that was full only moments ago.

Have i seeked professional help, absolutely. But with a monday to friday job, 8 to 5, im not able to see a doctor or a psychiatrist. The few i did find that have extended hours, are booked and arnt able to see me. So right now, i have not seen any sort of professional about my depression.

I dont know what to do.