Thanks sooo much everybody for the support. It has been a tough week, and I'm realived that others understand my pains.

I feel a little better today, and the kids have really warmed up.....almost completely their normal selves again, which makes me very happy.

I'm a little embarressed I posted this, but I know it was the right thing to do.......it was sort of a break through for me, a part of letting go of all the crap I've been consuming for so long. I needed that!

I know my situation remains the same no matter how I feel that day. That's the reality part I wish I could alter quickly......like a dream. It's still a scary and hard place, but I know what needs to be done. It's just finding the strength to do it.

It's crazy how one can adapt to a situation they know isn't right or well. I don't want to adapt to "less than anymore", I want more......alot more. Not for me either because I'm like steel, I wouldn't care if I slept on a bench. It just my babies, all I want for them is a good life with nice things, and love. Love number one of course.

This college is my escape.....but it's such along progress. 4-6 years.....seems to long to be here in this. I don't know, maybe my dues will one day be paid, and I'll be free from this place.

Thank you everybody for caring to reply and be honest. You all are absolutley right.