Tree. I've seen tremendous improvement in how you are dealing with this stuff now, versus even 2 months ago...and an entire world from a year ago. I thought of two articles that might help you; i think they show 1--what a competent therapist you have and 2--what you are doing right now IS healing.

http://www.psychotherapynetworker.or...ing-the-brakes

This article really made me see how amazing your T is. He is doing it your way and at your speed.

And this article is a great read, this paragraph sort of sums it up:
I've found that in these crisis situations dissecting negative emotions or trying to rev up positive ones isn't the most useful step we can take. This isn't to say we should avoid discussions about how clients feel--far from it. But talking with clients about what they're doing and how they're coping provides not only a framework for them to talk about how they feel, but a real-life scaffolding for the eventual construction of more positive emotions. Hope follows action, rather than the other way around. Helping clients become aware that what they're doing--even if it's "merely" coping and "just" getting by--can be the first step toward rebuilding their sense of agency and control.

Link: http://www.psychotherapynetworker.or...matics-of-hope