Hi Cole ... I'm sorry you're going through this, but I am glad you've reached out. It's really hard to tell when someone does something due to being BP (mania in your wife's case) or when other factors are in play.

First, is your wife medicated? If so, is she working hand in hand with her pdoc in order to let him/her know that the meds might not be working 100%?? It's VERY important that as a person diagnosed BP she maintains her medicine regimen and that her Dr is keeping track of her behavior to make sure those meds are working correctly.

Second, are there any other issues within the marriage that might encourage a wondering eye? (no need to answer, just ask yourself the question and be honest to yourself). I know that for me, medicated or not ... when I was with my ex things were so out of whack and although we had happy moments the issues we had outweighed the happy moments. I still managed to let my mania take over and it was easier to cheat and do as I wanted with other men because in my head it wasn't worth me controlling my urges for a relationship on the rocks. BUT, now that I'm in a loving relationship, I do everything in my power to make it work and never get into a situation that I'll regret because I truly love my hubby and refuse to ruin what we have.

Third, have you been able to sit with her and determine that SHE understands her behavior is not really acceptable. A lot of times we get so involved on the grandiose feeling of mania and then the love for the attention we get from these men that logic goes out the window.

I really hope that you're able to determine what will work out best for you and your wife. I also wish your wife the best with her journey in life dealing with this illness. It's a rocky road, but can be a beautiful one with the right mindset and taking care of yourself.

I hope my experience dealing with my illness and relationships has helped. *hugs*