Thanks for the advise. Yes, she is medicated and her doctor even said that this is part of the BPD and a part of her personality she cannot control. (I heard this firsthand from him).

As for issues in the marriage, it boils down to this: if she wants 100 things and gets 99 of them, she will obsess over the one she does not have. I do not beleive that I or anyone else can possibly fullfill her needs.

If we did not have two young children (including an 8 year old who also has a BPD diagonsis), it would not be such a difficult decision. But for my own mental health, I do not see any choice but divorce.