I have been a shoulder for my friends but with some I have had to put up a boundry or two. suicide is one of them. Basically it came down to me figuring out what I am capable of. having someone call me saying they are going to kill themselff and the if they carried through with that thread was I strong enough to live the rest of my life knowing that person had called me right before they dide and I was unable to do anything. The answer is no. I would not be able to life out my life like that. I also had to evaluate the situation -is this a person who repeatedly cries suicide and then is fine repeats. for me when a friend did that to me it said they learned to use suicide as a way to get my attention not because they were really looking for help. So I flat out told those friends that if in a highly suicidal state I would stay with them long enough for emergency servicies got there because in highly suicidal frames of mind they need therapist not me. In other friends I told them flat out don't call me if you are suicidal because I will hang up on you (this was when the friend was manipulating me with suicidal threats. when she couldnt get me by phone she sent her husband to the college and got me out of class. I followed through by telling her if shes going to take the pills go ahead I had a class to go to I wanst her marriage therapist. Then I used her phone and called her therapist and told the on call people to let her therapist know she was threatening suicide and I was going to call her every time she did that and then go back to my life of what I needed to get dont in that case get back to class. That person of course didn't take the pills and she never threatened me with suicide again)

Basically you need to decide how much you can be there for her and how and then sit down with her and explain your boundries around what you have decided that you can do for her.

I can tell you this cycle of abuse, make up, abuse, make up is typical of domestic violence and there nothing you can do until she hits rock bottom and decides enough. Unfortunately that rock bottom often come with a very costly price of some lasting physical harm or death. from the first abuse and make up situation she has been programmed and has accepted this is her life. Until something breaks through that its going to keep happening. Some city and states have a domestic violence law that if police are called for domestic violence during the act they automatically arrest the abuser. Sometimes therapy is mandated. So you might want to try the next time she calls if during the act, calling the poice in her area.