Welcome 2sweeties. It's natural that you have regret over what had happened, but please don't beat yourself up for it. First I would suggest counseling for yourself and possibly for your 4 year old. Couples counseling would be ideal too if your husband is willing to. Another thing I would suggest is educating yourself on the illness, so you can manage it better. The medication most likely won't take away all the symptoms and you will need to learn how to recognize those warning signals that you're not doing well.

As far as the credit card debt go it's not great, but if it makes you feel any better I racked up $60,000 in debt. I have a consolidation loan that I have 2.5 years left to pay back on it. It's a huge financial burden each month, but I learned a valuable lesson from it. I agree with Blackpup limit your access to what money you can spend (credit and cash).

Your husband refusing to see his children is a bit questionable to me. I understand he's hurt by what you did, but why is he taking it out on his children? In any relationship we all make mistakes (BP or not), but it takes both people to work on it. I hope that you and your husband are able to mend the relationship.

The book in my signature is for friends/family of those diagnosed it's excellent. There is also good information booklet on the Mood Disorder Society of Canada (it's free to download): http://www.mooddisorderscanada.ca/