Today has been difficult. I've been irritable, moody, and depressed. I tried going to an outdoor cafe at a park, and did some other things that are usually fun for me... but as they say, "wherever you go, there you are." I haven't been able to get away from my crappy mood. Sometimes I try to practice acceptance, and just be aware of how I'm feeling without either hating it or getting attached to it. That isn't working for me right now either. I just can't mentally get myself there. My psychiatrist recently lowered my dose of Abilify (at my request), and I hope that my current mental state isn't related to that. I've gained some weight during the 7 or so years that I've been on that medication, which I would really like to lose again.

I need to wash my dishes and clean up the kitchen... but all I want to do is curl up in a corner and hide.