In the immediate sense of things - yes, I feel pretty sucky after my appointment with my T. But, that's because I spend the hour actually dealing with things I have avoided my whole life. I spend the hour with someone who (paid or not) is genuinely there for me, something that freaks me out because I'm not used to being the one receiving care. I have an entire hour where I matter to someone. Where my feelings are important, and don't have to be shoved into the locked door of my mind.

It scares the crap out of me that someone is there for me. And I feel so raw and emotional after my sessions.

But, it will all be worth it, when I learn how to take care of my own emotional needs, and am no longer living with a cloud of depression following me.

Between the meds that I'm on, my appointments with my T, and knowing that I have someone I can call if I am stuck (I can't email my T, but I can call her any time) makes the pain almost tolerable.