I am having a REALLY hard time not taking all of the klonopin in the house. Not in a sui way. Just in a "I want to be numb way"

I have stayed REALLY busy today. Got up early, went for a run. Fed breakfast to the two younger boys and took them to the pool. Came home and dropped oldest son at baseball. Added a second coat of paint to the bathroom and cleaned up that mess. Did laundry. Cleaned. Cooked dinner and cleaned up. Moved ALL of the (very heavy) furniture in oldest son's room all by myself and started stripping wallpaper border in there. Took a shower

Now here I am with me. I'm too tired to really do anything physical, and doing physical stuff seems like the only way I am okay.

I was driving home from dropping oldest son at baseball today and I was RIGHT behind T. That was weird.

Help.