Hi Zen. Nicely sad.... seeking what brings forth peace is indeed a good thing. Sometimes when anxiety and other symptoms act up it is hard to imagine finding any peace. It is that awareness of personal power that keeps hope alive.

It has been an interesting and enlightening journey for me these last weeks. Learning to settle the racy thoughts that often can consume my brain by training myself to enter into mindfulness has made a world of difference. Practicing the meditative walking that Sun introduced to me has become a great technique to slow me down. Not only with my thinking but with how moving fast escalates the stress that then become anxiety that can bring me to my knees. I habitually seem to think everything I do is on some kind of tight time clock even when no time crunch exists.

Because of meditation et. al. I can now sense when I am starting to increase my speed and take action before it is out my hands. Being able to notice when the racy-ness is altering my sense of peace and wellness has become key to taking action. I can cut it off with focused breathing and then talk myself through slowing down. Meditative walking has been very helpful. It not only brings me into awareness but it brings me back to a place of level that I then celebrate as a victory of overcoming.

I have discovered the more times I experience a victory of overcoming a harmful dysfunction the more I am empowered to turn away from the dysfunction with a proven focused alternative.

I still have days and moments when symptoms catch me off guard and I crumble under the effects. The difference now is the length of time that I am caught. More and more meditation is helping me see what is happening and empower me to find that peaceful place of acceptance.

I was stuck in traffic last week and starting to panic that I would be late for a dentist appointment. It was already enough that I was heading into city traffic. I had been doing well dealing until I hit a construction zone and backed up traffic.

I automatically reacted with frustration and worry and anger. I caught myself before it took me over the edge. I pushed myself to focus on my breath and enter mindfulness. To put myself in the moment rather than concern myself with needing to get moving.

I shifted my attention to the views of the mountains, the wispy clouds in the sky and the wildflowers lining the road. I told myself no amount of fussing was going to change reality. I began to notice things that I would not have seen if I was speeding down the highway. I watch two eagles circling over the river and the circled around me. A sign of good fortune. I acknowledged that had I not been stalled in traffic I would have missed the gifts I was given in return.

Lavie taught me the power of singing so I began to sing. I sang affirmations and messages of acceptance. I got silly and even laughed at the words I was singing.

I have discovered that singing is a way to bring my breathing back to level and to lift my spirits. Since singing requires deep breaths in and exhausting breath out it works its magic. I have also noticed that yawning can have the same effect. Sometimes when the stress level is rising I will find myself yawning. It will happen spontaneously.

All of these techniques that I have been practicing thanks to the wisdom shared here have played a major role in opening up the door to the world for me again. I am working outside my home because of the gifts shared here. I am cutting off and overcoming those times when I feel the stress rising. Because I know what it feels like to not be consumed by stress etc it motivates me and empowers me to face the anxiety head on with a counter attack. Be gone anxiety!! I am in charge now!! lol.