Hiding, there is no such thing as normal. Everyone has something they deal with.

Yes, it would be nice if it would stop and go away. But now that you know you can consciously remember that the situation is different. It takes time just as it took time for you to get conditioned to a different response. At least you know the answer now, that is half the battle, not a question of your imagination anymore.

Hiding, I am very sorry that you had to experience your past, very sorry to the depths of me. I hope you can find peace in your life and try to leave the past behind you. It sounds like you have a much better man now, try to enjoy him. I hope he understands you and is good to you, you do deserve that. Please remember that you deserve to have a good life and that you are a good person.

Open Eyes