I've just been really down these past few days or weeks. I made a new friend in one of my support groups and now I find myself with growing feelings leading to unreasonable expectations and me getting hurt again althought i should know better by now.

as i said elsewhere my sleep cycle is changing, i'm hoping it is leading toward something better but in the meantime i feel worse than ever and i have to admit that i haven't taken my meds for two days. i've been waking so late that i'm worried about them effecting my sleep if i took them so late in the day and plus i've just been too tired to deal with all the pills. i hope to get back on schedule tomorrow and try to force myself out of bed earlier if only to take my meds and then go back to sleep to stop this from becoming a habit.

i also had a bit of alcohol tonight maybe to help me sleep athough it isn't quite bedtime yet. i know this is a bad idea and don't plan to repeat it but felt i should "come clean" here so that i can't go into denial as to this slip against better judgement.

love you all

dave

-- The world is what we make of it --
-- Dave
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