wow - i am sorry your dealing with all of this. it isn't easy to see someone spiral out of control; especially, when there are things that may help them. my father was an alcoholic his entire life; he never reached out and gave up his entire family.

in my experience - we can't "force" people into getting better. some prefer to stay stuck in their pain for many reasons. when this happens, we have to accept this fact; and process it to the best of our abilities. this is their journey; their life lessons to learn. not ours.

The most important thing for you to do is TAKE CARE OF YOU! I hope that doesn't sound selfish; Its not meant to. It's just the truth.

If you think about it those fighting whatever battle it is (ptsd/addictions/etc.) will only get better WHEN & IF they want to. none of life is easy - i certainly know that - but we can only give so much of ourselves in helping those we love; and at some point, we'll end up at the breaking point on our journey.